torsdag 9 augusti 2018

Back in the saddle again

Sorry, dear blog. I’ve been very lazy this summer. But I will not let this effort die! I need this blog. I need to do something positive. I’ve been doing OK, psychologically, I think. But I do sometimes feel unproductive. I need to do more things. And I think one part, and yes it’s a small part but still, is writing about things. Like my online therapy programme said, when we’re depressed, we’re not doing enough of the things that make us feel good. We may need help to figure out what those things are. And that is kind of partly what this blog does. What made you feel good today? Write it down! Remember it! Then do more of it! And share it with us.

The glass half sane

fredag 13 juli 2018

Positive things, day I don’t know, I suck

So I promised I’d get back to this after vacation but I forgot. Sorry.

Some positives this week:

I finally finished the first set of homework for therapy. I’m an excellent procrastinator, but I’ll work on that.

I got accepted to at least one of the uni classes I applied for (internet-based part-time courses, ‘cause I thought it might be nice to do some learning again but I’m still gonna work, not be a full time-student again. This is for fun.) But because I’ve lost my password, I can’t access the system to check. I can get a new one, but it would just be easier if I can find the one I have. I know I was accepted to the math class because they sent an email. But my first choice was French. French would be more useful. I’ve studied a lot of French but I still can’t speak it. I think I need practice speaking though, and I don’t know how well an internet course is going to give me that.

That brings me to another one. I’ve started using Duolingo again for learning French. My brother mentioned using it, so I was reminded. I still had it on my phone, I just forget to use it. But I’ve got a three day streak going now.

Speaking of phones, I ordered a new one. It’s waiting for me at the post office actually, gonna pick it up tomorrow. Since I got this one on a kind of lease-thing rather than buying it outright, I now (after two years) had to decide whether to pay the difference for keeping it or buy a new one. This one is still working OK for the most part, but there is this thing with the sound. I only get sound in one ear when using earphones, and it used to not bother me because I had a piercing in the other ear that stopped me from comfortably having an earphone there anyway, especially because it took ages to heal completely and I didn’t want to risk introducing any bacteria to the area. But now I’ve taken the piercing out, and I didn’t want to pay to keep a two-year old phone with that problem.

Pride is coming up in my city, and I’ve been thinking previous years that it’s a shame that my work doesn’t participate in the parade since a lot of organisations and agencies do. I mean, if other government agencies take that kind of stand, there shouldn’t be a problem with it, shouldn’t there? But this year, we are, kind of. We have a group that works against discrimination in our workplace, and lgbtq+ is obviously a big part of that, so this year they are gathering people to walk together. So that’s a cool thing that’s happening. I signed up to walk with them of course. Maybe now I’ll finally find out who the lgbtq+ people at work are, ha. We’re a huge work place and I know almost no one (I mean, I haven’t asked everyone, but among the people I know, few have pinged on my gaydar).

tisdag 3 juli 2018

Positive things, vacation edition

Since vacation me sucks at this, I’m not gonna fight it any more. So I’ll just post a few things when I feel like it, and next week when I’m back at work, I’ll be back to my only moderately flaky self.

  • The little things that make me feel close to my grandmother, like making an omelette, seeing forget-me-nots and snowdrops, knitting.
  • Strawberries
  • Chocolate eggs found on sale because it’s ages after Easter
  • Taylor Swift (I’ve had ‘Gorgeous’ in my head for like a month)
  • Cats doing the cautious pawing thing
  • Garage sales

tisdag 26 juni 2018

Positive things, day crap, I don’t know how many I’ve missed

OK, so I could count, and I will, but right now I just want to post and not have to find out exactly how remiss I’ve been. I had a couple of bad and also busy days, and then I went on vacation and shut off my brain. But I’ve been OK. Spending my days being lazy without feeling guilty about it, reading, lounging in the sun (when there is sun. The weather has been a bit unstable), playing games and spending time with people I like.

So, a little list of the positives:

  • Reading an actual book for hours at a time. (I’ve been listening to a lot of audiobooks lately, which is nice and allows for multi-tasking, but there is a feeling in reading that audiobooks don’t give. And some books simply demand to be read.)
  • Having people around me (I’m staying with my parents’ at the moment). Keeps me out of the weird headspace I sometimes get in when I’m alone.
  • Good news from The Bloggess
  • I had something to put here but it slipped my mind while I was typing the last one. I can’t think of any more right now. Umm... it’s my mom’s birthday on Thursday so there’ll be cake. Cake is positive. 
  • Actually, being at my parents’ means I eat less crap. THAT is a positive. 

tisdag 19 juni 2018

Positive things, day 50

Two days until vacation. It’s actually stressing me a little bit because I have stuff I need to get done. Not so much at work as at home. Need to tidy up, throw out all garbage, and pack because I’m leaving right after work on Thursday. But vacation is going to be so nice.

måndag 18 juni 2018

Positive things, day 49

The ending of this Grey’s Anatomy episode made me happy. So, SPOILERS. When Owen gets a foster kid and Amelia meets the teenage mother and decides to take her in and help her get clean. It was so nice and hopeful when they all go home together. Also, weird, but when I mistyped “help” it autocorrected to Leo, which is the baby’s name. I love coincidences like that.